Legacy of Oblivion

Aggramar is still having a huge problem with new people and long waits. The server queue seems to have been solved, in that the solution is getting rid of the queue and making you wait for the character screen indefinitely. Nice work, geniuses!

In case you’re new to the server and are wondering whether or not Aggramar is right for you, I have compiled seven rules that all Aggramarians… or uh, Aggramarites… Aggramarans… should abide by. Consider them…

The Seven Deadly Sins of Aggramar

1. Spellcheck. Know how to spell the name of your freaking server.
   

In case you’re wondering, that isn’t it.

2. Standards. When starting a guild, set some standards for your group and stick with them. Remember, you’re setting the building blocks your guild will need to grow over the next few months. Setting high standards is important to cultivate the select group of folks who will mold your guild into uberness.

Apparently the popular thought is that anything above level 10 is somewhat l33t, so if you’re accepting level 10 then that’s being selective. Oh wait, they’d prefer characters to be above 10, but they’ll probably take whatever they can get. Never mind.

3. Guild. In the event that you are unable to get into anyone else’s guild, create your own! Be sure to give your guild a sarcastic, angry name that says, “Screw you, Aggramar! I will be an army of one!”

That’s right, because nothing says “I applied to Blackrock PvP nine times and was rejected every time” like creating your own guild of one with a sarcastic name. Chin up, loser!

4. Name. When you create your characters, keep in mind that a name is everything. Come up with a strong name that tells the server who you are!

In this gentleman’s case, “Gank” means: “My pvp strategy is ganking, and yet I’m such a loser that I’m still only a Scout!”

5. Retards. The Alliance are all retards. Play Horde.

See?

6. eBay. It is not uncommon for people to turn to eBay, to purchase pre-played, pre-geared characters. Don’t do it, and let me tell you why. eBay players can be spotted a mile away.

They think it’s cute and social to shout out questions in general chat, but it isn’t. You can be spotted a mile away. Say no to eBay.

7. Orgrimmar. People shout random things in Orgrimmar because they believe that the server cares.

We don’t.

Well there you have it folks. If you are guilty of one of the above offenses, we’ll be sending Kevin Spacey around to dispose of you. Or at the very least, send you to another server where you’ll be a little more comfortable with your own kind. You know – idiots.